Listen. I’m not telling you this just to make you feel better.
It doesn’t matter how many times you have asked: “why can’t I get a boyfriend”. The results of your research will never prove that you are a loser. In fact, they just mean that there are some logical reasons why you are still struggling with men.
Today, I’d like to share with you 2 reasons that explain why a lot of women can’t find a boyfriend or a husband today. You will see that once you know exactly what are those reasons, your life will become gradually easier; you will feel less stressed, less needy, less angry.
Men will notice those changes, for sure… So here we go!
Problems 1: you are looking in the wrong place.
This problem is very common. Of course, you have your taste. A certain type of man attracts you more. There is no mistake here; the trouble appears when you start to look for your man in a place where he rarely goes. I will give an example that I’ve seen over and over since I’m a teenager.
Let’s say that you are a Christian; you are looking for a man who has the same values as yours. You want Jesus to be the center of your family. Now, it happens that, you don’t go that often to church. So you start to look for a man who’s from “outside”. You go to the bars, to the clubs; you ask your friends if they know someone.
It’s so complicated to find a life partner, you think…. Sometimes, you feel that you will never find him.
Now, listen. I don’t say that you will not find a Christian (I mean a practicing catholic or protestant) in a club. If you ask all the dancers on the floor, you will, for sure, find someone who has the same values. But how long it will take?
Related article: 3 Right Places To Find A Man
People who have Christian values are easy to find. They go to church every Sunday. What I mean, here, is that you will have to go where your kind of man likes to go.
If you are looking for a man of culture, you will have to go to the museum, to the library. You will have to more often to the concert.
Looking for a successful man? Ask yourself this question: where do I have to go to find a rich man.
Do not forget to join some meetups: for every type of men, you will find a meetup that is designed especially for them.
Now, I can hear you say: “what if what I’m simply looking a man who is interested in marriage”? Well, studies have shown that a lot of men (outside of the traditional Christian world) will start to look for the right one to marry when they feel that they no longer fit with the “dating market”. In another word, they feel that they are getting old. Usually, those men will think that they need to go to the next level: start a family, be more stable. Many of those men are open to marriage.
If you want to be married, start right now to think about the places where you will be able to meet those single men (or divorced men).
Related article: How to get a man to marry you. Give his sense of freedom
Problem 2: inner moral problems and fear.
This problem that is not talked about that much. You know, fear can be your worst enemy. It can totally ruin your chance to seduce the man you want. Fear of rejection; fear of being stuck with the wrong guy; fear of letting the right one pass by because you have made the bad choice.
Last week, a man told me that, the lady he has met a couple of months ago has finally decided to stop dating him. Here’s the reason: she just couldn’t turn her back to all the other possibilities. Now, I’m not jugging her. A lot of men do the same. I will simply say is this: that woman is afraid to do the wrong choice; she not afraid to admit it.
But a lot of women feel the same without thinking about it. Are you one of them? If your answer is yes, I bet that, in the past, you have blown your chances with men a few times. That’s OK. We all have our issues.
Another problem: it’s when you feel a conflict between the way you have been educated and kind of life you want to live. It may seem ridiculous but that problem cause a lot stress your personal life.
A woman told me once that she was looking for a man who will be a good provider. This desire goes against the way she has been raised: a woman should be autonomous and make her own money.
“Anyway, when he will leave you, you will lose all your contacts; you will be no longer in that social environment anymore”, say her friends, and parents
The lady has not realized yet how to deal with this tension she feels inside. She thinks that what she’s looking for is wrong. It’s a kind of “sin” to be a mom at home.
So here she is looking for a different type of man. She’s not really interested in the men she meets. And every time she finds one who is OK, something always happens. End of the relation…
Related article: What If I Never Find A Boyfriend? Dealing With Fear
The solution is to do your best to notice the kind of conflict that may exist in your mind. It’s so easy to say.
“Good men in New York are all taken. Or they are gay…”
Come on, lady. Tell me about your fear? Be honest. No need to be ashamed. The reason we are on this earth is to get rid of our issues.
One by one…
Remember. If the word is responsible for all your difficulties, it means that there nothing you can do to have a better life. It’s like living is just digging your grave.
It makes me feel great to think that you are a strong woman. I invite you to think about those issues you may have.
My goal of my article is not to talk about the fact that maybe your problem is that you are too picky or maybe that you are always looking for perfection. If that’s the case, I suggest that you ask this question: why am I looking for perfection. Why am I too picky?
Now you know that there’s always a solution to whatever happens in our personal life. That solution is always inside of you.
Look in yourself and go!
Find your amazing man.