My love, my sweet love…
You know the story Betty Cooper and her crush Archie right? There’s a good chance that you have read the comics when you were… Well, younger. Do you remember in what kind of situation she was? Yes. She was madly in love. But for Archie, That beautiful was so precious. Maybe too much. She was almost like a sister for him. She was his best friend.
Betty wanted Archie as her boyfriend. But she was caught in the friend zone.
Does the friend zone really exist?
There’s a lot of talk about that concept today. Does the friend zone exist? Some people say that this idea is a whim, period. Their argument is that this concept is used by men who have feeling for their female friend. But they feel some resistance.
“I love you Shawn. But not that way…”
Ouch… it surely hurts. So those men instead of saying that their friend is not interest to get in a romantic relationship with them will blame the “friend zone”. Their pride is safe.
The problem with that argument is that many women have suffered from the same problem.
And I will be frank with you. A closed friend of mine has tasted some of that zone because of me…
“I think that we would be a great couple together. Don’t you think, she asks holding my arm”?
I smile and say:
“Girl, you are the best friend I will ever have. But us? As a couple? Man, it would be a mess…”
The thing is that I know her. She’s almost like my sister. You don’t get aroused when you kiss your brother don’t you? It’s almost the same for us, men.
I said almost.
That friend of mine is a cute, sexy lady (just like Betty Cooper). She lives a difficult moment right now with her boyfriend. I don’t want to get in their business. But can a woman put some heat in a friendship so the man starts to have problems to label her only as a friend? The answer is YES. I will tell you why in this article.
The challenge: Make him miss you. Really?
“I didn’t wanna pressure you, baby. But all I wanted to do: I wanna be your lover”. Prince– I want to be your lover
First let’s get rid of this argument. Some writers suggest that you are too present in his life. You are there when he needs you. So the first step is to make yourself scarce. Well Sure he will miss you.
“I miss her… She’s my best friend.”
This is not the kind of reaction you want to create, right? Ideally you would want him to miss you as a possible girlfriend. It will never happen if you have not created that possibility in his mind first. That is not to say that you don’t want him to find a girlfriend before you have created that feeling inside of him. Make him miss you? Bah!
We need to talk…
You already know how men hate that statement. For a boyfriend, it means troubles. Now if you are not his girlfriend yet, it will make him say.
“Hum… What’s going wrong?”
This is the kind of mental state you will put him when you want to open your heart. Doesn’t look like ideal kind of mood you want to create before you say “I love you”.
Just forget about making the big declaration: It’s not the right moment yet. The reason is that in love and especially in seduction, SHOWING will always have a better impact that just TELLING. What you want to show? You want to show that you are available.
Hummm… You are about to mess up this mind, lady. Good for you, lady. And good for him too.
But don’t start to talk serious with him right away. You may spoil all your chances.
Hacking the relation
“Tradition and norms aren’t rules in the constitution”. – Rick Santelli
“Don’t think that this is written in the tablets of stone”. – My history teacher
Usually, it’s called etiquette. Usually this is a word that describe the code of behavior that we are expected to see respected in a group or in society. But in some ways, we have the same kind of expectation better friends, colleagues and lovers. What’s funny is that if we defy that code, something happens automatically.
Let’s take, for instance, a situation where a woman really needs help because he’s in danger. Her boyfriend is drunk and breaks everything in the house. Has he tries to ‘knock down’ the fridge in the kitchen; she calls her best friend for help. But that friend just doesn’t care…
This moment changes everything in the relationship between those two women. Maybe their friendship has just ended with that phone call. This because we expect that, in difficult moment, a friend will at least try to help us. Are you following me?
Friends act a certain way. Lovers act a certain way. Enemies are supposed to hate each other. In a play, everyone should play his part, making the right signals so that the story of our lives stays clear and understandable. But what if you start to mess up the signals?
Be less interested and more interesting…
“My heart is opened like a highway. Like Franky said: ‘I did it my say” Bon Jovi-It’s my life.
Yes what if you start to mess with his mind using some signal that he’s not expecting from you as a friend? He will start to have difficulty to label you as a friend. But hey! You are his friend, right? But why things start to be so confused?
This is the kind of confusion you want to create in his mind. But you will have to create it slowly. In fact, the rule is this one. The deepest the friendship is, the more you will have to take your time to play with the signals.
In the next article, we will take a look the different technique that you can use to play with the expectations of the man you love. Be ready to have fun with those ideas. They will confuse your sweety; he will probably like it even if he will be a bit perturbed.
For now, do you have any questions, any comments? Don’t be shy and leave them in the little box below.
Now go. Think about your man. Imagine how much fun you will have with him playing that subtle seduction game.
Love,
Jo Fontaine.
XOXO
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