Here’s the story…
When things are a disappointment, try not to be so discouraged. -Carol Burnett.
Cindy really likes that man. When she sees him, she feels that her heart will just pop out of her chest. Boom-boom, boom-boom… but then, something happens. It’s like the violins stops to play their romantic concerto. Something big happened, for sure. A love story cannot end that abruptly, right? Cindy starts to complain about men.
“How do you get a man to commit to you? Men suck” she mumbles.
But, hey, what about that man you are dating?
“He’s afraid of commitment?
Now, Cindy talks about her fears, blame him for her problems. What is astounding is that Cindy has been with him for only one week.
How can you really know a person in just a week?
Kind of short, no?
To commit? Yes, but for a reason
“I love thinking about the film, the project and committing as much as possible”– Vince Diesel
I will tell you why what Vince Diesel said is important. It really describes how men think. They want to commit for a reason. That reason is something that will shake them inside, give them some energy, some drive.
The reason “because you have to“ is not enough.
Listen. I had the reputation to be “noncommittal”. Last week, my best friend looked at me, got closer and whispered.
“I never thought that it would last for that long…”
I remember that she almost dressed herself like Cupid to match her neighbor and me. Now I feel that she miss me a bit. My girl friend is a bit jealous. I can’t see my best as much as a used too.
Realize that the idea of “noncommittal” men is wrong. Men do commit. But they commit for a reason. Like I said, for most of them, the reason “because you have to” is not enough. Do that exercise: count around you how many people commit themselves out of pressure.
- Pressure because this is what good people do.
- Pressure because they are sick and tired of being alone.
It you want to translate that feeling men have in only one formula, you will end up with that equation:
To commit = Jail Sentence.
The good news is that you can totally mess up that law. You can almost make the man you want forget that formula. This is the power have, ladies. You have heard about those kings who decided to renounce to their throne for love. You have heard stories about guys who decided to confront their dad, defend the woman they loved and, finally, got disinherited.
This is the power you have (know more about how irresistible you can be, read the article how to find your mate. Be irresistible).
Rock his world
I wanna rock with you (all night). We’re gonna rock the night away- Rock with you. Michael Jackson
Feel the power you have. The power to rock his world. Understand that, now, and you will find more and more different ways to shake his knees. Usually, we hear that sex is what man are looking for.
But there’s something men crave for. It’s that emotion, that energy a woman can create in their mind, in their body. We just love that boost. We feel that we can create anything, overcome any obstacle, and be successful in anything we want to do.
Man! That drive better than sex.
Now realize that men can be successful on their own (you can find plenty of examples). But it’s just how succulent what you offer is: with you, men feel that they can do a lot of things without even trying.
I still remember that Monday morning in the beginning of my relationship with my girlfriend. No Monday morning blues. I knew that this day would be a hard one in the office. Who cares?
“Bah! I can handle it. No problem, I thought”
The more your man feels fantastic when you are around, the more he will be yours. With you in his life, he will slowly dissolve many of his fears about commitment.
Until he says in his head: “why not? Sounds good...”
The Mind Tricks
Be careful with withholding or mind trick. Men have an excellent mind trick detector in their brain (especially as relationship is concerned). Yes many of them will fall in the trap. But it is because they just don’t know what to do in that situation; so they just close their eyes.
But they know.
Why play the hard to get game when you just have to continue to do your thing as usual? You still have friends, family, and colleague. Do you have a hobby? Maybe you like to go to your yoga class twice a week. Continue to live your normal life. It means that he has to earn you. He will understand that clear and simple message and will respect you for that. You don’t have to play any kind of game. A woman who as her own life is an interesting woman. It means that she’s not boring that she will not try to restrict the space a man needs to breathe. What a woman you are!
The famous ultimatum is not necessarily a mind trick. You can get exactly what you want with that technique; but it can backfire on you later on.
Picture yourself in that scene. You know that your man is totally hooked. So you let him know that it payback time. It’s the ring or it’s over.
Handsome, you will have to pay with a life commitment.
Tell me what will happen.
Well the first possible scenario will be that soon or later, he will run away.
The other possible is that he’s afraid to lose you. In that case, your strategy works. But here, ask yourself this question: Do you want a couple, a marriage based on fear? If you do, go on. Just know that one day, your husband will remember of the reason why he got engaged (the ultimatum). It will happen probably when your couple will live a difficult moment. At that moment, he’s almost gone.
Having a couple based on fear is like building a sand castle. The first wave will demolish everything.
I Fell Like A Million Bucks
“I like the feeling you’re giving me, just hold me and I’m in ecstasy”- the way you make me feel. Michael Jackson.
The trick is to make him want more of you. It happens that most men like to chase. That’s good for you. What’s the bait? Well, it’s you. Or to be most specific, the way you make him feel. Until you come simply with the subject as you talk to your friend you said well by boyfriend said. We will talk more about how to make him feel fantastic when you are around (and even when you are not there). But here are two ideas that you can do right now.
Know what he likes: The best thing you can do is to make him discover some new stuff in the domain he likes most. I still remember the day my soon-to-be girlfriend said to me:
“I know that you just love funk music. Do you know Bohannon?”
I could not believe my ears when I heard the bass line of let’s start the dance.
What a groove! Man, it was like I was in a trance.
And it’s because of her.
Wow… A woman who can make me discover some great music (even if she’s not a musician)? Hum…
Do something like that for your sweetie and you have your own apartment in his mind. Maybe, one day, you will own all the building…
The other idea work best if you feel that you can openly flirt with the man you want. You already know that even if he’s not in love yet, he likes you. Find funny sexy words to show that you like him and that he’s desirable. It’s even better if he’s in front of his friends.
“Hey, Handsome. Can I play with your toys?”
A million bucks.
Ladies. We can’t live without you…
You now know what to do to make him feel great when he’s around you? Go and find your amazing man!