Today, I’m going to talk to you about the different techniques that you can use to approach a man. OK, you don’t know him very well. Maybe you don’t even know his name; It doesn’t matter. There’s a way to break the ice safely. No need to lose your dignity! Here we go.
What “approaching” means to you?
“The times they are a-changin’” – Bob Dylan.
It’s true. Times have changed. A few years ago, only men seemed to be confused and puzzled about the art of approaching. Today, everybody is concerned about the subject. Now think about this: what does “approaching” means to you? Realize that approaching is not necessarily flirting. Approaching is simply starting a conversation for the first time with someone. Try to remember that point and a lot of the fear to approach will go away.
Consider this: you don’t need to use complicated techniques to talk to a man for the first time. The reason is that men are not used to be approached. They don’t feel the need to build a protection wall to defend themselves (in fact, most men are surprised and happy to be approached).
The point is this: to approach a man you only have to talk to him. About anything. Don’t try of over think the process. Don’t worry; things will go pretty straight forward. We, men, are not trained to act like we are not interested (even if we are)…
You know what I mean?
Related article: read the article 2 Safe Ways To Flirt With Men And Turn Them On if you want to flirt with him right away!
What “being noticed” means to you?
The desire to be noticed can ruin all your chances to meet a man. You are so afraid to fail that you never make the first step. Please, remember this important point: don’t worry too much about being noticed. Your cute man will notice you when you will talk to him. It’s that simple.
Talk to someone = Being noticed
But what are you going to talk about?
Ask for help
This is the classic. You will never look needy when you ask for some help. Well, let me rephrase that… You will never look like a needy woman. All you do is to pretend that you need some help for a task. Is there something heavy that you need to put on your office table? Here’s your opportunity to approach him!
Another idea: maybe you have heard that he’s an Eagle fan. You tell him that you want to learn more about the team this season. Which player should you follow closely?
Another variation of the technique is to offer some help. I know a lady who has a crush for a cute man in her office. He plays in a rock band. It happens that the lady knows a good music manager. Even for a shy woman, the approach is easy.
“Hey! I’ve heard that you in a rock band. Do you have a manager right now? Well I know one. He’s well-known in the industry.”
That approach is a winner! I don’t know how the love story is doing right now. I will get some news in couple of weeks, for sure… :0)
Find a way to ask for some help. Or offer some help. Either way, the contact is made…
Related article: read the post How To Know If A Man Loves Me? to read easily the signs that he’s about to fall in love with you.
Make a statement
Another technique is simply to make a statement. It can be a simple comment about the weather. Again, women do not approach men a lot. So, he will not say: “is that the best pick up line you have”? In fact, he will not even realize that you are approaching him! Men are dumb (but we are proud about it).
Another good tip is to give a sincere compliment. Compliment him about the way he talks or his clothes. You are a bit shy? Wel,l instead of saying: “I like your sweater. You look great!” ask him: “Hi, where did you buy that sweater? It looks great!”
See the difference?
Anyway, the contact is made, and now, he has noticed you.
Asking… without asking… Is he single?
You are probably a master of that technique- but I will talk about it anyway. You can easily know if a man is single or not.
Remember that lady who’s in love with a musician colleague? She said to him:
“Hope your girlfriend is not too jealous about all those groupies turning around you”.
“We are not that successful yet”, the cute guy answered.
That answer was not the answer she wanted to hear.
“Do you mean that your girlfriend has not said a word yet? No comments? It’s hard to believe…”
“Well… I don’t have a girlfriend”
AHA!
Start right away to use cute names
In a precedent article, I have talked about some safe cute names you can use when you talk to a man that you don’t know very well.
In fact, you can use some of those names as you approach him for the first time! Here’s how.
The word “darling” is perfect when he gives you a hand. Sure, you can say: “Oh… You are so sweet”. But maybe you don’t feel comfortable with that technique. Here’s what you can do.
Let’s say that he’s bringing you the report you were waiting for. As you are opening the file, say with an easy tone of voice: “thank you, darling”
Nothing serious. Keep doing your task. You do not ignore him. You appreciate what he has done. But you are busy.
Following me?
A safe, cute name is an important tool to approach a man. Use that technique, if you can, to create some sparks before you decide to make your first approach.
Related article: read the article 3 magical tips to make a man fall in love with you if you want to learn more about the art of using pet names.
The not-so-direct-approach. the next step.
You feel confident? Then make the next step right away! Let’s say that in the discussion he looks at you. He’s speechless (or puzzled). You already know that he’s single. Here what you can do (he will think about you for the 24 next hours).
Act like you are surprised of his reaction then say: “What? If you want my phone number, it’s OK. But do not give my phone number to anybody else”. (You can even punch lightly his shoulder).
Then give him your phone number.
Important article: learn the art of conversation and the art of building sexual tension. Read the post conversation chemistry-review now !
You gotta go…
A Good advice. Now, with all the tool that you have learn to have a great discussion, things are going well.
Very well…
Well the next step is this: leave the discussion.
Yes, you heard me. Leave the discussion.
This technique may seem counter-intuitive, but here’s the idea. Let the magic work. Of course, you will let him know that you have no choice. You are busy. But let him know that you really liked that discussion. And ask him: “Will I see you again?” or “We will talk again, right?”
Now you know how to approach a man that you don’t know yet.
Go! And find your amazing man.
Love,
Jo Fontaine
XOXO.
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