Well-being | The Right Husband

How to find a boyfriend fast. Beware of your thoughts

October 13, 2019 By Jo Fontaine Leave a Comment

Lady, in this article, I will share with you a story that happened last Friday in a single dating event. Now, this story is very important for you.

Here’s why.

It will explain very clearly what I mean when I say: “beware of your thoughts; they can ruin your love life”. Here is what you can do: every time you will ask yourself “how to find a boyfriend?” remember that story. You will then have the opportunity to take a hard look at your thoughts and make some decisions. No doubt, there’s a good chance that those conceptions are slowing you down.

Of course, taking this resolution(to observe our thoughts) sucks sometimes. But hey! If it pays, why not? See that exercise as if you were taking out the garbage.

Related article: to know more about how your thoughts affect your love life, read the article Why you can’t get a boyfriend. Stop auto sabotage your love life.

So here’s how it starts:

Got something for you, Jo

So my friend Joanne calls me. She says:

“I guess you already know why I’m calling you”.

“You just went to a single dating even”.

Joanne is a bit surprised but not that much.

“Yeah… This is what I do almost every Friday”, she mumbles

Then her voice gets all her joyful energy back. She says:

“I got something for your blog”.

“Tell me, darling”, I say, almost laughing.

I can’t find what I’m looking for

“I still haven’t found what I’m looking for”. U2

Meet Ann. Ann is pretty special because, even if she’s 39 years old, well… She looks like she’s 25.

It’s a drag for her.

“Boohoo, poor you” would say most people (OK this is what I said at first, I confess…).

But here is her problem. Ann wants to date a man of her age.

And the only guys who approach her are men in their mid- twenties…

“I just can’t find a man of my age”.

Joanne is a bit surprised to hear that problem. But soon she starts to understand. Let’s say that Ann is anxious. She wants to start a family before it’s too late. The problem is that most men in their mid-twenties are still boys in some ways.

This is probably what happened when her last boyfriend broke up with her. Her 26 years old ex-boyfriend said:

“The age difference is not a problem today. But soon, it will be. We better stop our relationship now…”

So here I’m raising an eyebrow. When I was 27, I have dated an older woman; So I know that the problem cannot be that simple.

It’s like Joanne reads my mind:

“That what’s she says. I feel that the problem is more complicated than that. That woman is a bit complicated”.

Your thoughts can stop you seeing clearly…

“If that’s your best, your best won’t do”. Were not gonna take it. Twisted Sister.

So here is Ann, complaining about her young look. She says that, today, it’s so difficult to find a man of the same age. Not older, not younger. She thinks that things were so much easier before.

Let’s think about it.

You’re 25, back in the days. At that age, you should already have a fiancée. Or something was wrong…

This social pressure was true for men and women. How could you expect a promotion in your office if you were not married?

And she keeps talking to everybody who’s ready to listen to her. Yada, yadi, yada.

But the things is that, in the group there is a handsome man. He’s seriously interested in Ann. But she doesn’t even notice him. She keeps whining about her sorry love life.

Sad thing. Because that man is 41 years old… Just perfect for her.

You are responsible for your thoughts

“Hello. Is it me you’re looking for?” Hello- Lionel Richie.

I nod as I hear the end of the story. To tell the truth, I’m not very surprised. Nor should you. Your love life is the result of your thoughts. It’s not the society, the fact that men have changed, the internet or the fact that the male identity has been broken lately.

“How did that guy reacted, I ask? Have you talked to him?”

“Hum… yes. He was disappointed. He said to me: I don’t have a change with her…”

Joanne makes a pause and finally says:

“I had to cheer him up. I just said the truth. Ann is pretty complicated…”

Related article: to know more about how your thoughts will attract the love life that fits with your vibration, read the article How to attract the man you want – the law of attraction.

Conclusion

Your thoughts will make or ruin your love life. Period.

I know that the hardest will be to accept this. We are responsible for our thoughts. I’ve been there. My best friend have been there. And so my sister.

See it this way. Can you afford to lose opportunities to meet good men? How many nice people have your let pass just below your nose because you were trapped in your thoughts?

Realize this. This is not too late. You can make things better. But one thing is for sure: you got to stop that “love wastage”.

Following me?

Related article: to know more about how you can change your vibrations to attract men, read the article 4 tips to attract a man now.

Do you have question? Any comments? There’s a little white box below, just for you. I will be more than happy to read your ideas and thoughts.

Now you know that there is no need to let good men pass by because you are trapped in your mind.

Go, lady! And find your amazing man!

Love,

Jo Fontaine.

XOXO

Will I ever get a boyfriend? How to deal with anxiety of being alone forever

September 22, 2019 By Jo Fontaine Leave a Comment

This article is about how to deal with anxiety in general and especially in your love life. See, being worried can totally ruin your chance to find the man of your dreams. It can even break a relationship that you already have! A few years ago, I had a girlfriend who was constantly worried. Even today, many of my friends still don’t understand why we broke up. We were so close.

Don’t let that happen to you. Here we go!

Related article: What If I Never Find A Boyfriend? Dealing With Fear.

Why you should deal with your fears and anxiety.

Here is why you should start right away to deal with your fears and anxiety.

And anxious person cannot have a happy love life. Period
An anxious person is unable to appreciate a great moment with her or his love partner. This is dangerous because that situation creates a feeling of being unimportant and incapable in the loved one. This is a feeling that that men hate. For sure, they will start to look for somebody else.
Anxiety is like a magnet. It attracts negative and anxious people. It means that, soon or later, you will start to be surrounded with anxious people. How can you get away of that paralyzing state of mind in those circumstances? Think about it.

Some important signs

Look. There are some signs that you should pay attention. Find 2 or 3 of those symbols and you will have a clue that you might be anxious right now.

One of the signs, beside of being worried all the time, is that you seem to be always tired. Think about the last time you had a moment with your friends in a restaurant. Tell me. Can you date new a guy (or your boyfriend) without being absent mentally most of the time?

Hum…

Another sign of being anxious is that you are over-planning everything. You want to control everything around you. Of course, you realize that it’s impossible, don’t you?

Anxious people tend to ask a lot of question, to seek reassurance from others. If you have one of those traits, you better take a serious look to your general state of mind.

What is anxiety?

Let’s say that anxiety is self-preservation instinct gone wild. The reason is quite simple. You are always afraid that something bad will happen to you. Do you feel, in some ways, that the world is plotting against you? This is, no doubt, a sign that you are anxious. In other words, see anxiety as something a bit more complicated that an emotion: anxiety is a state of mind.

It can have many forms. For instance, you may have negative and disturbing thoughts about your future, your past, your loved one. You may feel that you will never have the chance to find a man to marry. This is a difficult situation because your gesture, your behaviors tend to adjust to your beliefs, your fears.

But there are ways to lower your amount of anxiety. Here are some ideas.

Breathing exercises (with a little twist).

Breathing exercises are well known as an excellent exercise to release the pressure. For sure, it works. In fact, I’m a bit surprising that only a few people use breathing exercises as a daily routine.

Maybe the reason is that it’s looks so boring.

A good way to add some “spice” to your breathing exercise is to simply practice it outside. I love to take a time to breathe in a park just walking or lying on the grass. The trees, the sky (and even the moon) have a relaxing virtue. Their presences will help you to slow down your thoughts as you breathe calmly. No need to use any “mantras” or to count from 1 to 5 as you inhale and exhale. Just admire the sky. Hear the wind getting between the tree branches. Hear the leaves softly shaking. Have you noticed how great the nature sounds?

Take notes

Another good way to remove some anxiety is to observe your thoughts, your non-verbal language. Yes, that’s right. It’s that’s simple. This technique is an excellent way to understand more clearly what’s going on in your mind. As you are writing in your notepad, you will eventually notice some patterns. Write in your journal how you feel, what is worrying you.

What you want is to observe your emotions. Doing so, you will start to put some distance between your state of mind and your own person -after all you are not your worries, right? You are more than that. I know a man who has started to time his worrying moment! He was sometime very depressed and anxious about his love life: he could not find a girlfriend. He simply started to put some numbers on his fears, as if they were laboratory rats. That’s how he started to take some distance with his anxieties. It’s impressive. The bottom line is this: observe, analyze. Here is why this technique is useful.

Related article: know more about the inner talk, read the article Make a man crazy about you by respecting yourself.

Focus on what you can change

The more you observe your emotions, the more you will start to understand them. This is the moment when you will have the opportunity to focus on things in your life that you can change.

Let’s take this example. You have not found a man yet. But it happens that you are worried about a possible betrayal that you may experience with your future boyfriend. After all, this is what happened to your friend, right? This is the kind of anxiety that can totally ruin all your chances to find your love. Yes, lies, betrayal exist. But no matter how hard you try, you will never control the future because it simply doesn’t belong to you.

The fact of the matter is it doesn’t exist at all. Yet.

So the only thing you can focus on is your present. The first step is to accept the fact that you are anxious about something that you can‘t control. Let your consciousness penetrate your emotions. Observe them. This is the perfect way to start to spot the lies that your emotions hides about your life. You have no real power over people. But you surely can change your attitude about life in general. For instance, why not practicing happiness about things that you have instead of things that you don’t? This habit can seriously weaken your fears.

Related article: to know more about the art of observing your emotions, read the article How To Mend My Broken Heart? 2 solutions To Help You Feel Better.

Conclusion

Lady, in general remember this: being proactive will always be a better strategy to make your life easier. Being anxious is by essence a passive attitude. That’s the reason it’s so painful.

Now you know that being anxious about being lonely forever will do nothing for you, right? But do not be hard on yourself if you are. Just be aware of it. Then act.

Once it’s done, go and find your amazing man!

Do you have any question? Any comments? There’s a little white box below just for you. I’ll be more than happy to read your ideas?

Love,

Jo Fontaine.

How To Find A Boyfriend: The Art of Talking To Strangers.

September 6, 2019 By Jo Fontaine Leave a Comment

In this article, I will tell you how you can find a boyfriend talking to perfect strangers. I will talk about the reason why you may decide to use that strategy and I will share with you some ideas that will make your research easier. In fact, those ideas can even enrich your social life in general. So here we go!

“Don’t talk to strangers”

The metal band DIO said it. Your mother probably said it too when you were 5-6 years old (just like my mom did). Sure, her intention was good. She just wanted to protect you. But, unfortunately, the consequence of that warning is that, with time, we have lost the ability to talk to people we don’t know. In front of a stranger, we tend to freeze. Nothing comes out of our mind!

The thing is that you will, eventually, feel need to expand your social circle. One of the reason is that you are looking for a new boyfriend but you can’t count on your family or your friend no more. You have seen all the options around you, have evaluated evaluate them all. Nothing seems to work. Now, you know that you will have to look outside your social circle.

In other words, you will have to talk to people you don’t know at all to find your man. Here are some ideas to start to talk to perfect strangers.

To learn more about the art of approaching, read the article 4 tips to attract a man now. Check this post now!

Speed dating event. A system created to talk to strangers:

By system, here, I mean an organization that will assist you as you are approaching people you don’t know. Maybe it’s difficult for you to engage a conversation with a stranger. Well here’s one solution: go to speed dating events. In a speed dating event, you will have no choice. Even it you are shy, you will have to talk to men you have never seen before. In fact, it will happen so many times in the evening that it will become almost second nature at the end of the event.

Sure, speed dating is a very useful system because it has a lot of rules. It’s made to make people come to you: men will have to talk to you. In a Speed dating event, you cannot be ignored. You cannot hide too: you will have to talk to those guys. Shy or not shy, you will talk to, at least, 10 men in an evening. Of course tools like your copy of the ebook conversation chemistry will help you to create some wonderful moments with those fellows. More about this below. Promise.

Does it mean that you will be able to do the same in the street, after the event? Well, not yet. But things are going better! Here is the next idea.

Single meetups

After a while, you will feel more confident. You will think that you can start a conversation without all those speed-dating rules. O.K, you still need some help to find the common interests. After all, your future boyfriend has to share some of his passion with you, right? In this situation, single events may be a perfect solution for you.

Go to Meetup.com and take a look at the different types of single event groups. A lot of “meetups” seem to turn over a special topic, a passion. For instance, movies, arts, dance or religion. Obviously, the people who assist those meetups have a special interest in those topics. Let’s say that you like a music Meetup. You will not have to work hard to find the common interest you have with a man who attends to the same event. The organization has already done a part of the job for you!

Give yourself the chance to talk to the people who attend the meeting. Here, I’m not talking only about men. I’m talking to the women too. At first, you need to familiarize yourself with people you don’t know in general. Once you feel better, start to talk mostly to men.

Practice talking to people everywhere.

There will be a day when you will feel more confident to talk to people you don’t know. You will have the ability to easily find common interests. You will be more relaxed as you engage a conversation. Sure, you are not ready yet to approach men in the subway or in the street. So the next step will be about how to talk to the men you meet wherever you go.

Now remember this: the best way to engage a conversation is simply to ask a simple question.

What question will you ask? Well, for instance, think about a place you want to go. Let’s say that you will have to take the subway to get to your favorite restaurant. You already know what is the nearest the station. Why not practicing to talk to strangers by asking the directions? Just pretend that you don’t know how to go to that place. How do you get to that station, first?

Again, start to ask women first. Then, ask women and men. When you feel comfortable, ask the question exclusively to men.

This is how you learn to talk to perfect strangers. Once that important step is done, something magical will happen: some of those simple conversations will become flirts. It will happen naturally. So, for now, you don’t need to learn any kind of opener to start a conversation with a man. Let those great moments come by themselves.

Do you have any questions, any comments? There is a little white box just below just for you. I will be more than happy to read your ideas.

Now you know how to get more comfortable talking with people you don’t know. Practice, have fun.

And go get that awesome man you deserve!

Love,

Jo Fontaine.

XOXO

P.S : To know more abou the eBook conversation chemistry read now the article conversation chemistry – review.

Here’s why you can’t get a boyfriend. Are you insecure?

August 14, 2019 By Jo Fontaine Leave a Comment

This article is about one big reason why you can’t get a boyfriend yet: insecurity. This state of mind affects deeply your behaviors, attitude. It’s express itself when you think, deep inside, that you are not enough to merit the appreciation of the others. You think that you are inadequate for the task that you wish to perform. This problem can be very tricky. It can ruin your love life without being noticed. You need to know if you are insecure because this is the first step to get rid of that trouble.

Here are a few points to know if you are insecure.

Related article: To learn how to get rid of self-doubt, read the article I can’t find a boyfriend -Destroy your doubt.

You avoid contact.

This is a typical aspect of your body language when you are insecure: you do not like to watch people in the eyes. For that reason, some people think that you are a bit snob. This is the kind of judgement insecurity creates: if you do not look in the eyes, it means that you are trying to hide something; or you think that you are better than everybody else.

Another typical habit: You always try to leave the first in a meeting or when you have a date. Personally, it took me a while to realize that insecurity was the reason why my mother always wanted to leave fast a family reunion or in an evening. A last aspect of the fear to connect with the other is that you are always the first to hang up the phone.

But this fear can lead to some severe consequence in your love life. Insecure people tend to end up their relationship first. You don’t want that your boyfriend break up with you. Well, the solution is to break up first!

Even if things are going pretty well…

Try to look at your love life. Do you tend to sabotage your relationships?

Related article: To learn how to approach men, read the article 4 tips to attract a man now.

Worries, worries, worries…

When it starts, it never stops. You just have met the guy. Hundreds of questions pop up in your mind. You are worried about everything.

“Did I say something wrong? He said this… What did he mean? How was my makeup, my hair? Too much? Not enough? Oh, my God… Hope he’s not married. I would never date a cheater. But if he’s single, did I say the right things? Why am I the only woman who doesn’t have a damn clue about flirting?”

Of course, you can find yourself in this state of mind once in a while. You are insecure if this is your general state of mind when you date someone.

Push away, and they pull back in

Insecure people do not want to get hurt. So they often push away those who want to get closer to them. An insecure woman will be a real puzzle for a man. Some guys will try to clear up the mystery; most of them will fail. The others will simply walk away. This is when an insecure lady will realize her mistake. She will try to pull back her man in her life. Sometime, it will work. Sometime, it won’t.

Insecurity must be everywhere…

Usually, insecure people do not want to be the only person suffering in the room. So usually, they will try to share their insecurity and mess up the other’s people mind.

A lady told me recently that a woman, worried to die alone, said to her:

“What? You are still looking for a husband? But aren’t you worried about your age? Soon you will be too old to have children.”

This is typical. Insecurity must be everywhere, according to the worried people.

Related article: To learn how to stop being influenced by negative people and how deal with the fear of being alone, read the article help me get a boyfriend. First, get rid of that person.

Can’t take a compliment, Can’t see what’s good

Do you put yourself down often? Do you have problem to accept a compliment? Insecure people just can’t take a good word. How many times have you said something like that?

“You say I’m beautiful only because you are a sweet person…”

Yesterday, I was watching a rap battle. A professional rapper was standing in front of a stand up comedian with a low self-esteem. They were supposed to roast each other. The comedian putted himself down so badly that the rapper didn’t know what to say. The job was already done.

Man… It was sad…

This is not the answer I want to hear…

Insecurity is like being deaf. You never hear the answer that is given. Even if it’s the answer you hear is once you are waiting for… Insecure people cannot accept an answer. That’s why they are asking the same question over and over.

Do you love me? Do you love me? Do you love me?

Are you thinking about somebody, right now?

Hit back

Until now, we have talked about one type of insecure personality. That person thinks that she has nothing interesting to offer to anyone. This trouble of the personality can be called inferiority complex. But some men and women will try to over compensate that lack of energy.

Oh, for sure, they get hurt easily like all the insecure people. But they will seek for revenge. And lord! it will happen fast. They will hit hard. Too hard. They get a little slap on the hand, and they will get their bazooka.

How do you react when you feel hurt?

Control freaks

A lot of insecure people are control freaks. Since they are scared to death that something happens, they will try to control their date, their spouse, and all the activities they make. They want to control what the other say, how they think. Do you try to control everything pretending that you want that everything is perfect?

Striving for superiority

Some people go too far to over compensate their insecurity. They want to hide their fear so bad that they will oppress everybody around them. If they can make someone unhappy, they are happy.

Here is their logic: “I make people sweat, therefore I exist.”

This type of insecure person is a “disagree machine”. No wonder that this they have problems to have a healthy relationship.

Conclusion

This article is not about how to get rid of insecurity: the hardest is to identify the problem.

Very often, an insecure person will use those lines: “this is reality”. “That’s how it goes today”. Some people will play the tough card and will want to show how strong they are. But they can be broken in a snap of fingers.

Once you have accepted that you are insecure, you will be able to create a plan to have an easier life.

Now you know that being scared of everything or bragging about how tough will get you nowhere.

Take care of yourself. And find that amazing man.

Love,

Jo Fontaine

4 tips to attract a man now

August 10, 2019 By Jo Fontaine Leave a Comment

In this article, I will share with you 4 tips to attract a man fast. Here we go!

Tip #1: forget about the competition

There are two types of competition that can sabotage your chance to meet a man. The first one is the way you consider the other women. Every day, you scroll down the news feed on Twitter, Facebook. You wonder: “how can I compete with those models”? Then you think: “well, those ladies workout every day for hours and hours. They have the money to pay nutritionists, yoga instructors and make-up specialists. Their job is stay in shape and look pretty”.

But you have a regular 9 to 5 job. It’s impossible. So you think it’s impossible to can’t compete with those women.

Well, you don’t have to…

Men love all type of women. Realize that there is more than one guy who likes exactly your type of body. This is the reason why you see some gorgeous men in couple with women who are not considered “hot” by the social standard. In a precedent article, I have talked about the fact that only one characteristic of your body is enough to make a man crazy about you. The magic starts if you have what he likes. You don’t have to look like Megan fox to attract a man.

The other type completion is created by the belief that you are not enough. You think that you need to be just like your neighbor who has found a boyfriend recently. This attitude will hurt you: it affects your body language. You cannot attract a man with a type of energy that says: “don’t look at me. I don’t like my body”.

Forget about that competition. Forget about those pinups on social media. You know some women who have a lot of success with men? Who cares! You have something that they don’t have.

You are you.

You are unique.

Tip #2: confidence works better than a simple smile.

This second tips is the logical point following the first one. Confidence is the master key to attract men. Some women don’t have it. But they fake it. Think about Marilyn Monroe, for instant.

No matter how you look, you will have problem to get noticed if you are hiding yourself. Does it mean that you have to be out going with men? Not necessarily.

The Collins dictionary defines the word “confidence” as a state of mind when a person is sure about his or her own abilities, qualities or ideas. It means that to be confident, you need to know your value. You have to know exactly what you have to offer to a man you like.

So here is a very important step : take a piece a paper. Now answer those questions: what is special about you? Think about all the good things your friends have told you about your personality. Why do they like you so much? It you have problems to find some positive aspect of your personality ask a friend. You will get some answers pretty fast, believe me.

The idea, here, is pretty simple. Ask yourself: “what do I have to offer to that cute guy?”

If your answer is “I don’t know”, I will say: “look harder”

Nobody is insignificant unless they think they are…

Tip #3: let that positive vibe irradiate all around you.

Now, knowing that you have something to offer is one thing. Showing it is something else. How do you know that you are a passionate woman, a lady who’s fun to be around? It’s a bit complicated to explain to a guy that you are the right woman for him. The best solution is to use your positive vibration to make him feel that you are a fascinating woman.

“Ugh… Positive vibration, you say. Not again that expression. What does it mean, anyway?”

A vibration is simply how you feel inside. Think about it. When you feel great in your mind and in your body, you act in a certain relaxed way. Have you noticed that, when you are in a joyful mood, people react in a certain way? They see you as a breath of fresh air, so to speak. Men are very sensible to that kind of vibration. Novel and movie have talked about that fact. Men love to feel that there’s something special in a woman.

Remember. A relaxed and feminine attitude is sexy for a man.

Now the best way to have that positive vibe is to start to practice a passion. If you don’t have one, right now, find it. You can’t be a fascinating woman if you have no passion at all. You will need that energy to multiply inside so that you will be able to enchant the man you want.

Have a pleasant life. It’s the easiest way to attract a man.

Related article: Learn how to build a positive vibe. Read the post why I can’t find a boyfriend. Change your map to love.

Tip #4 Appearance counts. But not that much

Now you know why appearance is not the major key to attract a man. By “appearance”, I’m talking about the cost of your clothes, how expensive is the makeup you put on your face. Sure, you want to make sure that everybody understands that you take care of your body. You want to be seen as a classy woman, a lady of value. That’s OK. This is just a statement you are making. Once it’s done, try to remember that you are not in competition with the other women around. I know that this advice is very difficult to follow for some of you, ladies. I know that many women use their appearance not only to attract men but to send messages to the “competition”.

But the truth is this. To attract the right guys, you don’t have to count that much on the clothes you wear. A man who likes you will find you attractive anyway.

Related article: Know why your look doesn’t matter that much. Read the article looking for a new boyfriend. Does your look really matter?

Tip #4 Learn how to approach men.

There was a time when you just have to sit there and wait until a man comes to you. Well, it seems that this era is gone. Today, you will have to be proactive to get noticed. No, I don’t mean that you will have to flirt with men. You don’t have to if you are shy. But you will have to learn how to approach a man. In the post How to approach a man safely, I say that to “Approach” means to “talk to someone for the first time”. The subject of this first contact is not important.

Related article: master the art of conversation and build sexual tension in a man now!. Read the post conversation chemistry – review.

Conclusion

To attract a man, you will have no choice but to observe what going on inside. How to you feel about yourself? Do you think that you deserve to be approached by men? Do you have something great to offer? Don’t worry if your answer is “no” to any of those questions. It simply means that you will have to discover a part of yourself that you have not seen yet. Like I have said, Nobody is insignificant unless they think they are…

In other words, there is a door that is just in front of you, ready to be opened. You have the opportunity to change your life, to make it more pleasant.

Now you know that a pleasant life attracts the people you want.

Go and find your amazing man.

Love,

Jo Fontaine

The step #1 to find a good man

July 30, 2019 By Jo Fontaine Leave a Comment

Today may be an important post for you. As you read this article you will probably realize that you will need to adjust the way you think about your man and about relationships in general. Here’s how it works. To find a good man you will have to make this important first step: learn to ask the right question and stop asking yourself the wrong ones. Here’s why…

Asking the wrong question will ruin your chance to find a good guy.

A wrong question is pretty simple to spot if you think about it. This is the question that you ask when you are angry. Those questions are very difficult to answer because they are based frustration. You pretend that you are looking for an answer. In fact, what you do is just telling what you think about the situation. Here’s how this type of question looks like.

“What wrong with men?”

“Why men can’t stop lying?”

“Things were so easier back in the days. Why everything has to be that complicated today.”

“Why men can’t commit”

Here’s the catch. If your friend tells you: “yeah! You are right”, you stay frustrated. But someone is agreed with you so it’s OK.

If a woman (or a man. But in those times, we prefer to keep our mouth shut) is not agreed with you and give you an answer, you will be pissed. You will not listen to her even if her advice is wise.

You just want to express your frustration. As you do, you lose your focus, and stop looking around you. I have shared with you many real stories about singles that have totally been blind by frustration. Good men where only a few feet away; and they were unable to see them!

Good men are very sensitive to the vibration of women. They don’t want to have a complicated love life. Collect more and more of that frustration by asking the wrong questions and if will become more and more difficult for you to find a good man.

Related article: read the post why I can’t find a boyfriend. Change your map to love to learn more about the art of changing your way of thinking.

Asking the right question will help you understand your mistakes

Asking the right question is so important for you because they will help you find out your mistakes. Once you find them, you will have the chance to stop to make them.

A good question always opens possibilities for you. Here are some examples:

“Is there something I’m missing, here?”

“Is there something I need to change in my perception of what a good relationship should be?”

“Ok. Something got wrong in the date what was it”.

A valuable answer will always give you the opportunity to do something to make your next dating smoother. For answer, you can tell yourself that the next time that a guy lacks you in a speed dating event, there’s no second chance. You will not date him. You will not even let him explain himself.

Now let’s say that you just had a bad day at the office. You are not in a good mood but you still have to meet a guy at a chic restaurant. Of course, the date is not a success. Is there something you have missed?”

Yes. Better call the man and tell the truth and postpone the date

Because you are looking for something to do to make thing better the next time, your frustration doesn’t take all your mental space. You are in the solution mode. You are still ready to find the good man you are looking for.

Related article: read the post how to keep a man in love forever according to the zodiac signs- Do not do those mistakes. P.S: you don’t have to believe in astrology to read it.

Asking the right questions will help you realize what you really want…

Here is a very important question you may ask yourself.

“For real. Why am I looking for a good man?”

The more you dig, the more you may found answer that will unsettle you. In fact this is the reason why human hate to ask themselves the real question.

For instance, you might discover that, yes; you may be looking for a good man. But you think that a good man is boring as hell. You know, bald guy with glasses and work with computers…

Not that cute… But hey! he’s a good man…

Here’s another example of the definition you give to the expression “good guy” and what you are really looking for.

In a precedent article, I have talked about a Japanese lady who has found a good guy. She felt so happy. It happens that this guys was totally immature.

Let’s say that the odds were against her. When they got married, she was about 30 years old.

And his man was… 23…

What “good man” meant for her back them? Well and man who was kind to her and who finally would accept to marry her.

The label “Good” has comes with the ring for the lady. Why? In a lot of Japanese family, a woman has to be married around 28 years old. Things are changing right now, but the pressure is still heavy for a lot of women in Japan. She had to get rid of that family pressure. Finding that “good man” was, for her, the only way to get her mother and father off her back.

Take your time to think out what the expression “good man” means to you. A YouTuber recently divorced said that she was amazed of the number good guys there she has found.

I personally think that it’s true: they are everywhere (thought nobody’s perfect).

But things will be harder for you if your definition of a “good man” is a guy who will solve a problem you have.

Asking somebody else to solve your problem will, soon or later, lead to a big disappointment.

Following me?

Related article: how to find a quality man to know more about how to know exactly what you really want.

Conclusion

To conclude, ask yourself what you mean when you say “good man”. Who’s that guy? Take your time because there’s a good chance that your first answer will hide the real reason behind. When you will discover that reason, you will have the opportunity to understand that a man is not responsible for your existence. You will have to take care of your own issues. At that moment, you will start to discover the real good guys. Those who will be able to support you but who will not necessarily want to fulfill the little holes you have in your soul or your insecurities.

Remember. Most of the good, balanced men hate to have a complicated love life.

Now you know what is the first step to find a good man is to ask yourself the real questions and to find the answers. What “good” means to you? Why are you looking for a good man?

Go! And find your amazing man.

Love,

Jo Fontaine.

XOXO