Today may be an important post for you. As you read this article you will probably realize that you will need to adjust the way you think about your man and about relationships in general. Here’s how it works. To find a good man you will have to make this important first step: learn to ask the right question and stop asking yourself the wrong ones. Here’s why…
Asking the wrong question will ruin your chance to find a good guy.
A wrong question is pretty simple to spot if you think about it. This is the question that you ask when you are angry. Those questions are very difficult to answer because they are based frustration. You pretend that you are looking for an answer. In fact, what you do is just telling what you think about the situation. Here’s how this type of question looks like.
“What wrong with men?”
“Why men can’t stop lying?”
“Things were so easier back in the days. Why everything has to be that complicated today.”
“Why men can’t commit”
Here’s the catch. If your friend tells you: “yeah! You are right”, you stay frustrated. But someone is agreed with you so it’s OK.
If a woman (or a man. But in those times, we prefer to keep our mouth shut) is not agreed with you and give you an answer, you will be pissed. You will not listen to her even if her advice is wise.
You just want to express your frustration. As you do, you lose your focus, and stop looking around you. I have shared with you many real stories about singles that have totally been blind by frustration. Good men where only a few feet away; and they were unable to see them!
Good men are very sensitive to the vibration of women. They don’t want to have a complicated love life. Collect more and more of that frustration by asking the wrong questions and if will become more and more difficult for you to find a good man.
Related article: read the post why I can’t find a boyfriend. Change your map to love to learn more about the art of changing your way of thinking.
Asking the right question will help you understand your mistakes
Asking the right question is so important for you because they will help you find out your mistakes. Once you find them, you will have the chance to stop to make them.
A good question always opens possibilities for you. Here are some examples:
“Is there something I’m missing, here?”
“Is there something I need to change in my perception of what a good relationship should be?”
“Ok. Something got wrong in the date what was it”.
A valuable answer will always give you the opportunity to do something to make your next dating smoother. For answer, you can tell yourself that the next time that a guy lacks you in a speed dating event, there’s no second chance. You will not date him. You will not even let him explain himself.
Now let’s say that you just had a bad day at the office. You are not in a good mood but you still have to meet a guy at a chic restaurant. Of course, the date is not a success. Is there something you have missed?”
Yes. Better call the man and tell the truth and postpone the date
Because you are looking for something to do to make thing better the next time, your frustration doesn’t take all your mental space. You are in the solution mode. You are still ready to find the good man you are looking for.
Related article: read the post how to keep a man in love forever according to the zodiac signs- Do not do those mistakes. P.S: you don’t have to believe in astrology to read it.
Asking the right questions will help you realize what you really want…
Here is a very important question you may ask yourself.
“For real. Why am I looking for a good man?”
The more you dig, the more you may found answer that will unsettle you. In fact this is the reason why human hate to ask themselves the real question.
For instance, you might discover that, yes; you may be looking for a good man. But you think that a good man is boring as hell. You know, bald guy with glasses and work with computers…
Not that cute… But hey! he’s a good man…
Here’s another example of the definition you give to the expression “good guy” and what you are really looking for.
In a precedent article, I have talked about a Japanese lady who has found a good guy. She felt so happy. It happens that this guys was totally immature.
Let’s say that the odds were against her. When they got married, she was about 30 years old.
And his man was… 23…
What “good man” meant for her back them? Well and man who was kind to her and who finally would accept to marry her.
The label “Good” has comes with the ring for the lady. Why? In a lot of Japanese family, a woman has to be married around 28 years old. Things are changing right now, but the pressure is still heavy for a lot of women in Japan. She had to get rid of that family pressure. Finding that “good man” was, for her, the only way to get her mother and father off her back.
Take your time to think out what the expression “good man” means to you. A YouTuber recently divorced said that she was amazed of the number good guys there she has found.
I personally think that it’s true: they are everywhere (thought nobody’s perfect).
But things will be harder for you if your definition of a “good man” is a guy who will solve a problem you have.
Asking somebody else to solve your problem will, soon or later, lead to a big disappointment.
Related article: how to find a quality man to know more about how to know exactly what you really want.
To conclude, ask yourself what you mean when you say “good man”. Who’s that guy? Take your time because there’s a good chance that your first answer will hide the real reason behind. When you will discover that reason, you will have the opportunity to understand that a man is not responsible for your existence. You will have to take care of your own issues. At that moment, you will start to discover the real good guys. Those who will be able to support you but who will not necessarily want to fulfill the little holes you have in your soul or your insecurities.
Remember. Most of the good, balanced men hate to have a complicated love life.
Now you know what is the first step to find a good man is to ask yourself the real questions and to find the answers. What “good” means to you? Why are you looking for a good man?
Go! And find your amazing man.